Lost...In China

我结果的我的经验懂我不可以等别人的帮忙，我自己得帮助我。(As a result of my experience, I came to realize that I couldn’t simply wait around for help in life, but had to help myself and take action into my own hands.)

It was 10 p.m., 4/15/13, in the city of 苏州, 中国 (Suzhou, China), that I had the single most impactful experience of my life so far. I belonged in a group of students and teachers for this study tour across southeastern China. On this particular night, my touring group and I sought out an ATM. When I entered, I lost track of time, and expected my friends and teachers to wait for me…but when I did eventually exit, I found that I had been left behind.

             The emotions coursed through my body in rapid succession. First, shock, that I was alone. Then fear seized my body, as I realized I was lost in the middle of a foreign city without a working phone and with no way to contact anybody else. Pitiful helplessness then overcame my mind as I realized there was nothing in my power. And lastly, almost absurdly, came assuredness—my mind relaxed into blank certainty that one way or another I would be found relatively soon and all I had to do was sit there outside the small little ATM in a derelict car park…and wait.

It was nearly 30 minutes, before in a minute of lucidity, my mind once again operated and realized that there was no help coming. The exuberant little voice in my hand that yelled that all would be fine stopped for a second, and was overwhelmed by the louder voice of panic. “There is no help coming, nor will there be any help coming. There is absolutely no way for anyone to know that you are lost, and you may as well sit here for the next 48 hours.” The absent-minded, almost childish voice, finally faded away, and I was consciously drawn away from my absent-minded ideas of imaginary help.

But the replacing emotion was almost equally deleterious for panic and fear pumped through my body, freezing up my mind and stagnating any proper thought process. I felt paralyzed, sitting there, with adrenaline coursing through my veins, with insufferable inaction agitating myself as I had no available options in hand.

Finally a calming voice entered my head to squelch the alarm and terror that had reigned over me. But this voice that brought help was innately unrecognizable and yet all so familiar. “你为什么怕了？对什么怕了？问题在哪儿？你是在中国，还有你可能说中文。 (Why are you afraid? Of what are you afraid of? Where is the problem? You’re in China and you can speak Chinese. )” The voice was indisputably myself, but such seizure of control over the crisis by myself was simply unfathomable. Sensing my hesitation, it rang once more, “你为什么还等? (Why are you still waiting?)”. Deciding to take a leap of faith in myself, I decided that no help was coming to save me, and so I decided to take the matters into my own hands. After all, it wasn’t someone else’s life, but my own, and my sub-conscious, which weirdly was now in Chinese, had thrust it into my own life.

I stood up with confidence, leaving behind that seat of self-pity and absent-minded hope in that derelict space, and walked into a store in the vicinity. I asked the shopkeeper, “您好。您知道旅馆是在那人？我是学生可是我的老师拉我，哈哈，所以我要回来。（Hello. Do you know where the hotel is? I’m a student but my teacher left me behind, haha, so I wish to return.）”. They happily gave me directions down the road, and after another two conversations with other shopkeepers I managed to return to my friends and teachers after about 2 hours on my own.

When I got back, I found out my absence had not gone noticed. No one would have noticed my separation until the next morning. But I surprisingly did not find this astonishing, but only expected. How could I ever expect anyone else to be looking out for me? The only person obligated to ever help me was myself, and I had an obligation to take care of myself to the best of my ability. Had I not been thrust my own life in those circumstances, I may very well have sat there in absent-minded self-pity waiting for help ceaselessly until morning.

Whether it was in a particular situation or just in general life, my life was in no one else’s hands but mine. And though help is always welcome, in the end of the day I have to lead my own life… now it is unthinkable to me that there may have been a time that I expected, even took for granted, external control of my own life. And I owe it to those harsh circumstances to force myself to finally stand up and take matters into my own hands, not for those few hours, but for the rest of my life.   

我结果的我的经验懂我不可以等别人的帮忙，我自己得帮助我。(As a result of my experience, I came to realize that I couldn’t simply wait around for help in life, but had to help myself and take action into my own hands.)

Nanjing'm Sun Yat Sen Memorial

            In the city of Nanking, China, lies a grand memorial dedicated to the Chinese Nationalist Sun Yat Sen. At the foot of the tall memorial is a gate that everyone crosses through with a dedicatory inscription at the top. After passing through the arch you are presented with a wide span of stairs that continue up over a 1000 steps with a monument at the very top lined with hundreds of people. Despite my friends’ and my foreign appearances, we were soon integrated with the crowd. Eager as I was to practice my Chinese, it took less than two minutes for me to find a trio of college students to talk to.

At first I felt a little confronted by students as they gathered around me to talk. I felt my mind’s two years of learning Chinese abandon me as fear managed to clog my throat and brain. After an awkward 20 seconds of open mouthed gaping I managed to utter a weak “ni hao.” Inwardly, I felt so ridiculously conspicuous and foolish standing there, obviously a foreigner, with my mouth just hanging open. I simply turned around and tried not to make eye contact with anyone so I could be shrouded in inconspicuousness. But as I turned back on my heels, I had an odd epiphany as I realized that nothing could be more foolish than to travel across the world and learn a language for two years just to hide myself in the shadows. So once again turned around, but this time I faced the 1000 step scene and found different people to converse with. My mind still stuttered from time to time, but I simply shook it off, determined to not be deterred.  

The topics were endless and the opportunities unlimited, for I could converse with these crowds. Some people I spent a matter of minutes with, while a few others I spent over an hour. The relationships I formed with people were certainly not typical, as they found me a strange curiosity to be speaking their language and I found them to be equally interesting. Often I would stumble with my Chinese and feel slightly flustered, but they were polite and deft enough to help me continue. When we finally reached the top of the monument I was by far and away isolated from by comfort zone of friends, and instead was journeying by a different group of college students, and yet I felt at ease.

The memorial explained the enduring life of Sun Yat Sen, a Chinese politician that had time and time again got up after being pushed down by challenges in an attempt to establish democracy in China. The journey had certainly been worthwhile as I now felt great reverence for a man who always proved tenacious. By the end of the day I had met so many different people through my Chinese, I felt fairly accomplished. I had done what I had wanted to do in taking and studying Chinese. And it was this monument on this tall mountain that had taught me that there are countless possibilities for me to keep trying again and again.

Just How likely is World War III?

            Just how likely is a new global war? To properly understand the ramifications of the current situation in Ukraine and its neighboring countries, one must fully understand the beginnings of the earlier 20^th century wars, namely the First World War. Known then as the Great War, WWI had rather humble beginnings in relatively trifle matters. The trigger that set massive events into motion was the assassination of an Archduke of Austria-Hungary at the hands of the Black Hand, a Serbian terrorist group. As expected, Austria-Hungary acted out of anger, issuing an ultimatum to Serbia as a prelude to war. And henceforth the double-edged blade of alliances reared its ugly head over Europe and eventually the World, as dozens of countries were forced to make good on their treaties, alliances meant to ironically ensure security. Russia was bound to back Serbia, and as a result Germany declared war on Russia on behalf of Austria-Hungary. As a result England and France were sucked in as allies of Russia and hence so were the many English colonies, such as New Zealand and Australia.

            So how much of today’s situation parallels the circumstances precisely a century ago? Well, the change of government in Ukraine, due to the protests against Yanukovych, would have been a matter limited to Ukraine. However, it concerns both the western European countries and Russia because the new government is pulling further away from Russia and closer towards Western Europe. That combined with the fact that many Ukrainians and Russians in Crimea are protesting against the new government has incited Russia to move troops into Crimea without firing a shot. If we view Ukraine’s particular situation, torn between West and East, as a Civil War, this particular state of affairs is even closer to 1914. A trifle matter between two countries has brought Russia to stand ready to commit on one side. In 1914 Russia’s preparedness to enter on one side provoked Germany into declaring war because of the system of alliances. Well, today countries don’t have so many treaties and alliances ready for war, do they? European countries don’t have such explicit treaties today, but they have something even more tangling. The western countries have the European Union tying them into each other and the eastern countries are less formally tied together as all former Soviet Union. Already the EU has close ties to the new government, backed by Western Ukraine, and Russia has close ties with the previous government, still desired by Eastern Ukraine. Moreover the international community, including US, has reached a consensus against Russia. So in comparison to the Great War in 1914, the current situation looks pretty ready for war.

            However the factor that remains uncounted is the global community’s hard-learned lesson from the 20^th century wars. Especially with the evolution of even more destructive nuclear weapons and experience with arms races with the former USSR, the global community is more than ever inclined to try diplomacy as much as possible. After the series of global wars in the previous century, America should not have, and so far has not expressed, any desire for a full-blown global war with nuclear weapons on every side. So in the context of the 2014, and not 1914, WWIII is simply not likely. That said, it is fairly likely, that either the UN or the EU contemplate or even attempt sending in a small number of troops to see Russia out of Ukraine and that peace is returned.